Frivolity is Fun!

Random thoughts, no heavy lifting allowed!

Mismatched July 7, 2011

Most of the mail you get on match.com is pretty much junk, a lot of it along the lines of, “How r u” or “U r pretty.”  Fairly disheartening.  I applaud the following guys for at least entertaining while they disenchant …

 

From a 43 year old (I am 29 and look younger than that!):

“I am only chronographically 43, I’m a child at heart.” REALLY, sir??? A) It’s chronologically, not chronographically; and B) Ewww.

And then there was this creepy list, which came by itself, not even a hello or any kind of intro:

Hey!!

1. fav movie?

2. fav band?

3. any tatts/piercings?

4. part of town ya live in?

5. hangout spots?

6. beer , liquor or wine?

7. thong , bikini or boyshort?

8. turnons?

9. turnoffs? (annoying lists of stupid questions, textspeak abbreviations)

10. two places you wanna travel too?

11. three things most ppl dont know about ya or wouldnt gues? make them intresting/spicey

 

 

From a fifty year old man:

Hello
I signed up here: June 12th, 2011. Immediately I came across you and felt a strong urge to say hello. We seem to have more than enough in common to explore the possibilities…
If you are open-minded to getting together for drinks one night soon; let me know and “Let The Journey Begin”

 

 

Sigh …

 

More missed connections June 4, 2011

Occasionally I like to peruse the craigslist “missed connections” page, because it is HILARIOUS.

Another sampling:

Was at Wal-Mart when I noticed you today. It was around 3:15 and you were with your friend. You were a BBW very sexy had some very short shorts on and could see a piece of your ass check peeking under your shorts. We cashed out at registers right next to each other. You and friend each had a cart and headed out….I wanted to sat something to you as your were unloading your cart into your SUV…you were ridding in passenger. Our eyes met as you were talking the carts back and saw me in my truck!  When People of Walmart fall in love …

alot of ways to love you from head down to your sex toes, i just went to love you who are you I have know ideal but i have miss you find me. or u a bbw, or not black white,18-108 no i do not now u i just dream of u.point me the way. who am i blk male 42 also married. Eww, her sex toes?  What are those?  His wife is so lucky!

Ooh gurl this is pure vanilla and i am gooey and rich just like that peanut butter pie
id love to take you home and put you in a bubble bath with some water wings and just punish you.
maybe if you don’t get jazzy i’ll even feed you some watermelon juize after
come and get me
btw, i hope that dollar keeps you honest                Hungry yet?  (Because I’m not.)

There were several women that i noticed in there [Walmart] on 5/15 around 6:30 pm give or take the time. One that really stuck in my head was the one wearing a grey business suit. I was wearing blue jeans and a blue jean shirt with a flat top and fade haircut. Drop me a note if any are interested. Better hurry, ladies, because every girl’s crazy ’bout a sharp dressed man. 

Hey there is someone in L City goes by the code name Creamsicle4UinTN, his ad says he is 40 yo and I really want him to contact me. I have a big surprise for him and want to tell show him something really good. It will be well worth his time. Um, that’s just creepy.  Heebie.  Jeebies.

 

Missed connections May 13, 2011

Filed under: Social Media,Things I scoff at — tiffknox @ 2:10 AM

Occasionally I like to peruse the craigslist “missed connections” page, because it is HILARIOUS.

A sampling:

do you wanna bring back the tears or just the memory? every time you hang up its like im losing you all over agian. are you really content? Why settle for content when you could have love Love you melissa always have always will loved you now loved you then i wanna love you…..through thick and thin – Wow, he isn’t a poet and he didn’t know it.  Melissa is really missing out.

so this is crazy and doubt this will wrk but i’ve been curious for a long time now you use to come in where i worked and chat with the employees and I, i thought you were very handsome, probably could tell cause i got nervous as heck ha lol… i do believe your a attorney downtown, but if you see this and think its you hit me up telling me something that would let me know its the rite person or attach a pic 🙂 would love to chill with ya go get a drink or something.. – If you’re trying to date an attorney, please learn to spell, punctuate, and stop using emoticons and lols, unless it is someone turning wrecks into checks.  They have no standards.

Pookie hit me back. You know who this is. We talked about getting together many times but nothing ever panned out. Let’s make this happen. G. C’mon Pookie, go ahead and hit him back already.  Fo shizzle.

I don’t remember your name. But it’s been better than 14 years I believe since we met. Our mutual friend Chad introduced us. He was this sort of fat-ass kid obsessed with punk culture, and eventually went totally American Eagle. You lived somewhere sorta off Kanesville I think. But I could be wrong. I remember the house being old, probably late 1800’s easily. You had a nearly unhealthy obsession with Marilyn Monroe. You always smoked your cigarettes with a cigarette holder, and had an OCD-like habit of not inhaling the first drag and blowing the smoke over the cherry as to make sure it was lit. You introduced me to My Life With The Thrill Kill Kult. We were almost intimate on a couple of occasions. I remember we had some of the most soul incising deep conversations about life and what we thought was normal and not normal. You did drugs I didn’t even think of trying till many years later, yet we smoked pot on multiple occasions. I believe that is what usually brought us together.  If this sounds at all familiar, or you think you might know who I am talking about please contact me ASAP. If for no other reason than I’d like to reconnect and see where life has brought you.  I think she’s married to fat-ass Chad.

We waved on the free way by papermill. You where driving a blue car with pink tags. tell me what i was driving. Maybe we could meet up for a soda or something. hope to hear from you soon – Who wouldn’t want to have a soda with you, creepy highway waver?

we work togrther,,see,,lets chat,,,,nothing said about our conferse!!! descrete,,,waiting,, I don’t even know what this means … so I’m guessing they don’t work anywhere that involves forming a coherent thought … or typing.

 

Bring it on down to … Gagaville?? May 11, 2011

I really thought this was a joke, but the internet wouldn’t lie, especially about Lady Gaga, right?

She’s releasing songs on “FarmVille” before they can be heard anywhere else?  Because nothing says “Gaga” like farming??  Huh?  I always thought she was an odd one …

I think this is INCREDIBLY lame, but probably very smart, considering how much people like this game.  I never saw the appeal of these myself, and refuse to start now, even though I’m gaga for Gaga!

At least I can watch her appearance on American Idol tomorrow, I’ll just need to switch back to the Modern Family “Lady Gaga concert episode,” which I cannot wait for!!  Scuttlebutt is that she wants a guest role in the future!